I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve, I have a history of taking off my shirt

It has been an incredibly long few weeks but I think that I am ready to step back into the land of the living and actually attempt to ya know, live.
Mom died a week ago yesterday and her funeral was on Saturday. I was actually able to make it back home for it and for that I am eternally grateful. I feel a bit more peaceful now, though there is still regret for things that I can't change.
Now onto other issues.....
I have had my problems with what my family lovingly describes as OCD and ADD. I have focusing problems and at times will get all distracted by one point that usually is not the MAIN point of whatever it is that I am working on or talking about. I also have those little idiosyncrasies that I do all the time that makes whoever is around me absolutely bat shit. Lately though, it has gotten a bit out of control.
Now, I am not completely oblivious to my issues. I know that right at this particular moment in my life I am feeling really out of control so I am trying to compensate by having control over EVERYTHING ELSE. I recognize this. It doesn't help me at all though. I have this new thing that I keep finding myself doing and I really thought that I had been fairly slick about it but apparently my loving annoying family has been just humoring me.
I use hand sanitizer, ALOT.
I have a little travel container that hooks onto my purse. I also have another one that hooks onto each of my bags. I have a small bottle in my car. I have a large bottle in the kitchen by the sink and one in each bathroom on the counter. I use them all the time. Repeatedly.
I have bought 6 large bottles that I use to refill the smaller ones in the past few weeks. I think I have a hand sanitizer problem. And they noticed....they have all noticed and have apparently discussed it amongst themselves. But surely it's just sanitizer, right? It's not like it's crack or anything. I can..um...I can stop anytime I want.